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Trusting Others

Discussion in 'Philosophy' started by Rosyrain, Feb 4, 2017.

  1. Rosyrain Atom

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    It seems as though we live in a world where people no longer trust one another. I am guilty of this myself when it comes to homelessness. I work in Seattle and there is a huge rise in the homeless population going on at the moment. A while back, I would have seen a homeless person and would have been compelled to help them out in a small way, but I also know now that a lot of the people who live on the streets near where I work are addicted to drugs and do not want help from the city. I must admit that it has jaded my perspective on all homeless people and I am trying real hard to look at each individual's position with open eyes before I make a judgment and decide whether to help or not.

    I also have a hard time trusting people's intentions as I go about my everyday life. There are good people out there, but you have to make a quick decision when you interact with people to see if their intentions are real or if they are out to scam you out of something. What are your thoughts?
     
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  2. Alexandoy Bacteria

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    When trust is mentioned, the first thing that comes to my mind is money owed to me. I have countless of friends who borrowed money from me and they are gone now, meaning they avoided paying me and they decided to unfriend me huh. I was so generous with my money when I was younger and friends and even mere acquaintances could easily borrow from me. But when they started to fade away from sight, I realized that most people in my circle are opportunists. Now some of my friends and relatives are surprised that I don't lend money anymore. Yeah, I pitch in whenever I can like if they need money for medication. I'm still that generous guy when it comes to charitable alms but for lending money, no way. I have totally lost my trust to people who borrow money from me.
     
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  3. jimbob Cat Moderator

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    I hear you. I ended up just forgiving the debts as I knew I would likely never get the money back and I was tired of being aggravated over it.


    Trust? Not so much.

    Show me. Yes.
     
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  4. Geeta Molecule

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    It is quite difficult for me to trust anyone. This is all due to my life experience. Now a days I even can't trust my brother as well. I think for a naive trusting someone I very easy. I remember in my teenage I used to trust easily. But that trust produce harsh results for me. So now its can't trust anyone.
     
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  5. jimbob Cat Moderator

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    I hear you Geeta. It is more difficult for you gals than it is for us guys. Bud experiences just turn off our trust switch after a few disappointments.
     
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  6. PsychAL Atom

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    These days, trust is a commodity you would not be willing to part with, especially when it involves money matters. My mother lent money to friends before, and sadly she never got paid back. I also lent some money to a "friend" but she never paid me back. But then again, this misplaced trust is the very reason why we are shaped in the present. We all learn from experience not to place too much trust in people, especially those we hardly know.
     
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  7. Decentlady Bacteria

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    I don't trust anyone easily and not just in money matters.

    I guess we all had our share of negative experiences when it comes to trusting.

    Although I had never had someone cheat me in monetary matters as I have never been in the habit of lending or borrowing from the beginning, I am nevertheless slow in trusting a person in general to a certain degree.
     
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  8. Shine_Spirit Bacteria

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    For everything that happens in the world, and for everything I've already - unfortunately - could witness, I have my reservations to actually believe in others.

    I'm a man who loves to talk... I talk to everyone. But, talking is one thing... Trusting is something very different and unfortunately, people often mix this up very easily.

    My cycle of friendships is very little (I'm very selective), but the friends that I have are worth gold and I trust them blindly.

    Trusting is something that demands time, and sometimes... Much longer than we can imagine (sometimes it takes so long that I've even wondered if this really existed) and trust is not for anyone.
     
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  9. jimbob Cat Moderator

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    Yeah, more often than not being nice sets you up for the scam artists. (You are considered an easy hit.)
     
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  10. moondebi Molecule

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    I do trust people if they're not complete strangers.
    Experiences and instances though want me to act otherwise, but I cannot but trust people. I believe, when people violate my trust they do more harm to themselves rather than me. In expense of some money, or some other petty interest if someone wants to expose himself or herself, it would their choice. I would go by my instinct.
     
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  11. jimbob Cat Moderator

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    Reminded me of a song:

     
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  12. Zyni Bacteria

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    In the case of homeless people or anyone on the street asking for money, I try to give them a little something. I feel like it's not up to me to judge or to worry about what they do with it. If I do the right thing (for me) by giving then what happens after that isn't up to me.

    As far as being trusting in general goes, it's hard for me as well. I think we have to take stock. Are we comparing everyone we meet to people we have met in the past, especially those who have done us wrong?

    A good example for me was learning to trust my husband (oh so many years ago). I had some bad experiences with men who were jerks. He taught me that I needed to see him for himself, not look at him like I looked at other men and how they had behaved. It was an eye opener.
     
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  13. Rosyrain Atom

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    I do not recall the last time I actually lent money to someone, it is just not something I do because you really learn about people when they owe you something. I have donated money to a couple of friends in the past who needed something like milk and did not have a dime to pay for it. I do not want anyone to have an obligation to me, so if I can afford to give them $10 or so to make their situation better, that is how I help out.

    The older I get, the harder of a time I have trusting people, especially if they have betrayed my trust in the past. I know how to move on, but I proceed with caution.
     
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  14. Jasmin Cottontail Molecule

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    Giving trust seems easy for me but when I experienced pain and betrayal, it suddenly changed. I now don't trust people easily. I always have doubts with their words and actions, with their intentions and motives. But I don't think of them as bad people, especially people whom I don't know. It's just that I won't give them my full trust unless they've proven me wrong, that they should be trusted.
     
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  15. Sweed2 Molecule

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    I used to be very trusting in all things but as I got older and married, and experienced lots of heartache and betrayal, from friends and family I found myself putting up an invisible wall where I now wait and watch to determine whom to trust or not. Still I get surprised now and then by someone who seems charming and kind, and hardworking, yet is not really. I hate this as I like to be a trusting soul, but find no one is as they seem to be at first glance or meeting.
     
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  16. ray Bacteria

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    I know some persons do not trust others as a policy because they feel the world is no more trustworthy. But I have a different take as I believe that the trust is the basic requirement for human or keep the relations going. I have always thought that trust is necessary for our survival. I agree it may vary from context to context, from person to person based on personal relationship, cultures and societies.
     
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  17. DR KOKIL AGARWAL Molecule

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    For me trust is a big thing. It is the backbone of any relationship that survives in this world. There were times when I was very liberal at trusting others but now with all the lessons learnt in life I know that if I blindly trust others and expect them to be faithful to me the way I'm it is my stupidity and nothing else.

    Since then I meaning of trust in my life has completely changed. I cannot trust a person until I have tried and tested him enough. For me any person who has to develop trust has to go through many tests.

    Once broken it is something that cannot to rebuilt at least for me.
     
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  18. WhyWeaver Bacteria

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    My husband and I have decided to help homeless individuals begging for money, one at a time time. We often invite the person to a nearby restaurant and ask him to order what he needs to eat. Then, we pay. These people are often starving--of physical food and emotional 'feed' to help them get by another day.
     
    Last edited: Mar 6, 2017
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  19. Zyni Bacteria

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    For me, it is possible for trust to be rebuilt, but it would not be easy. If someone burned me, they would have to show genuine remorse and a sincere desire to not hurt me again. They would have to prove themselves. I wouldn't just automatically trust them again. They could get there eventually though, if they really wanted to.

    It depends on the person too. It's much more difficult to just write off someone you love deeply.
     
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  20. Selena Bacteria

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    I used to trust everyone but some bad experiences with a few crazy people on forums has changed me. You'd be surprised at how evil some people are....to the point of stalking and harassing.

    Someone once had the nerve to try and call me on my cell phone....I would never do that unless it was okayed by the person.

    I was told by many who left that forum that I probably don't belong there with these types of people....what's so funny now is that one of them who told me this is on there.

    Someone actually used to call her squid face lol....I had to have that explained....anyway, I've gotten off track but bottom line...be careful on the interenet.
     
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